There is a Tooth Fairy myth, a Santa Clause myth and…A Supermom myth! Advertising, media, your friends, your friends’ friends, your ego, your mirror reflection, your shadow on the wall in the darkest nights- walking on your fingertips scared shitless to wake this untamed creature up- all of them force this new ‘Super Mom’ feature on you.
You delightedly, and most importantly ‘willingly’ welcome this new nickname. You spend 9 months reading into it, roaming malls, spending on products that you never saw on shelves and prepare a larger than life hospital bag at the earliest of your calendar, because why not? You have all the time in the world to do whatever (considered later as a bizarre thought) comes to your head, be it a decent cup of coffee that is indulgently sipped without being divided throughout baby naps or a full body wax (not just the parts that appear publicly), just in case this heaven sent creature pops up earlier than scheduled.
“This planet will still exist if you fake a migraine and delegate to your mother-in-law or if you sleep an extra hour and miss a diaper change.”
The scariest experience in the world ends like a piece of cake (in comparison to what happens next) and you become a person/mammal with infinite options and features, catering to an unexpected life. You still want to prove that you are a supermom and you get disappointed each and every time things get out of control. With brutalizing sleeping routines and empty explanations behind earsplitting midnight screaming, you hit the floor, still trying to prove that you are a Supermom, just like the woman in the cheese TV commercial who wakes up with a wide smile preparing sandwiches for happy kids and an exaggeratedly happier husband. You set a new life goal, which is hunting down the mental person who invented the sentence ‘slept like a baby’.
Then it starts to hurt so bad like a cruel belly flop into the pool. Then it becomes harder after 72 hours of no sleep, and then it gets worse after you realize that this is it, this is what they were talking about and I never understood, this is Motherhood! Then they argue with you and you hear them shout with some new age language like Co-sleeping, Nipple Confusion, Montessori, Colic, Tantrum and the list goes on. You ask, what is right and what is wrong? The could-haves and the should-haves start whirl wilding in your head ending in frustration and severe weariness.
“Acceptance that some things could be out of control is the lost and found key to a happy motherhood.”
This planet will still exist if you fake a migraine and delegate to your mother-in-law or if you sleep an extra hour and miss a diaper change.
Acceptance that some things could be out of control is the lost and found key to a happy motherhood. Learning that working hard is essential, but it’s also ok to laugh at your mistakes and failures. Learning that timetables and schedules aren’t baby friendly is part of self-cherishing and acceptance. Learning that parenting books are just pages written by a human being and not a sacred holy book to live by, is part of the self-realization and acceptance equation. Not listening to them, laughing at their expectations and accepting your new lifestyle as long as you aren’t massively harming your child is the paved way to sanity.