This Earth was created with a balance that is represented in everything around us; morning and night, happiness and sorrow, black and white and of course, our genders; male and female which are the yin and the yang that unite to form a perfect circle. Each of these two forces is a complete entity on its own that when united with the other it supports and strengthens it to use its full potential and be all it can be.
Men and women each have a set of responsibilities towards each other and rights from the other. These responsibilities and rights don’t exactly have a manual, but are defined by the instincts created within us as men and women. Men, for example, are physically stronger, making it their responsibility to be the protector of the unit. Women, on the other hand, are the nurtures who are responsible for bringing warmth into a home. Men are not scared of mice and rats while women run screaming at the mere sight of a spider, and so on. These natural instincts and characteristics create the balance of a whole, or at least they used to.
At some point, the balance tipped and the norm has become the exception.For some reason, perhaps due to the feminist movement of the previous century or because of something in the water, it has become alright for our genders to switch roles. This exchange in responsibilities and rights is so skewed that it conflicts with the instincts we are born with and causes dilemma after dilemma in our society. Let’s take romantic relationships as an example. When two people are attracted to one another, it is the man’s role, no, it is his duty, to pursue the woman and it a woman’s God-given right to be pursued. Nowadays, we encounter several relationships where the woman is the huntress and the man just sits back and lets the woman say the first ‘I love you’. When that happens, a man’s ‘hunting’ instinct is not satisfied and he ends up being turned off while a woman’s instinct to be cared for and protected is scattered in the wind as she learns to become more independent and, therefore, feels neglected because her man isn’t making the necessary gestures or taking the actions that make her feel desired.
When on Earth did this balance tip? Why did it fall heavier on one side? When did the ‘norm’ become the ‘exception’? Why are we, as women, accepting to take on responsibilities that are not ours? And why are men giving up on theirs so damn easily and vice versa of course in other scenarios?
In this particular case, the relationships that begin with the woman taking the first step, sometimes more than just the first step, is bound to result in an unhappy couple. When your basic need as a man to make an effort to impress a woman is unfed and you find the woman doing that for you, it conflicts with your desire for the woman altogether. No normal man wants a woman to drive the car or hold the remote control, but, by letting her take the first step in the relationship, you are automatically stripping yourself of the right to be the ‘man’ in the relationship. So what about women? When a woman pursues a man and is left unsatisfied when her needs for being pursued and flattered are unmet, she only has herself to blame. Neither parties are satisfied nor does that cause frustration and disagreement and a whole bunch of other things.
You, as a woman, must not agree to make a gesture that is not yours to make. And, you, as a man, must live up to your responsibility as the pursuer and go make an effort to impress the woman for God’s sake! We need to remember the gender by which we were created and we need to stick to our God-given rights and responsibilities.
We need to let a woman be a woman and a man be a man…
