We all know lots of fairy tales from our childhood, and we’ve heard how did the story end up wonderfully and how our heroes “lived happily ever after”; But did anyone think about what happened to Cinderella or Snow White later on? What happened to the feeling after the fog is lifted? Did they eventually live happily ever after? Will it be love forever like how it was written? Well, I really don’t know.
We don’t know what happened to Cinderella when she got pregnant later on and how did she deal with “prince charming” AKA husband during her hormonal mood swings while pregnancy. What I don’t understand why would pregnant women take it out on their husbands when they are perfectly normal with their other friends?
What happened to Cinderella when prince charming stopped looking in her eyes and tell her she’s his sunshine like he used to do? We don’t know what happened when she stops taking care of herself and constantly gaining weight? We also don’t know what happened to prince charming after getting a bit older and gaining a few extra pounds around his waist? Why does he prefer staying at work or go out with “the boys” rather than being with her.
Ladies, happily ever after is a very deceiving phrase. Life does not stop after getting married. Marriage is not a safe zone where everything is going to be ok? Marriage is hard and keeping a happy marriage requires lots of work and effort from both sides.
Many couples ignore or avoid lots of personal issues and problems with the other partner before marriage. They believe that as soon as they get married something magical is going to happen and issues will be solved by itself because they will live happily ever after!! Well, guess what? Problems will not be solved by themselves. Actually being married makes it harder to fix these problems. We need to look at marriage as a project and any project can fail or succeed according to how much effort you put in. You both need to put commonly agreed laws, objectives and work plan. Things should be clear among partners. Clear two-way communication is the key. I know how hard it is for us to have clear communication and how hard to speak out. We are not used to it. We were not brought up to say our mind. Our culture does not allow it.
When we are kids if we say what we really think we are considered rude. Parents and teachers won’t take it lightly. I remember a conversation I had with a professor in which he was bragging about how he doesn’t allow his students to disagree or even discuss with him. He considered discussing with him rude and a big challenge to his authority. So it will be hard initially but as we all know, nothing comes easy.
Marrying your soul mate is not the end of it. This soul mate might end up to be your worst enemy if you both fail to find common grounds and proper communication. Soul mate is something you develop through years of living together. I don’t believe in finding him or her on the spot like we commonly believe. Maybe this is one of our problems since couples expect to find a soul mate right away and if it didn’t work out it will be like the end of the world.
The story of soul mate came from the Greek methodology goes like this: “When Gods created man, they made him perfect. He was smart, wise, witty, pretty and strong. Then soon after he was created, Gods started feeling jealous of his perfection. They decided to cut him into two parts, a man and a woman to make him imperfect.
Ever since, men and women are looking for their other half to be prefect again. The lucky one is the one who finds his or her missing half and the unlucky one is the one who spends his or her life either looking for the other half or simply living with a wrong half.
To tell you the truth, I was initially so taken by this story and used it many times as a pickup line too. Surprisingly it worked like magic. I guess ladies want to believe in the perfect match concept. But seriously is there such thing as “soul mate” and happy ever after? Do we really have to spend our entire life looking for “the one” more than we should work for a perfect relation?
Koosy says, you can find a soul mate if you choose right and then work hard on the relation. By that, you’ll stand a good chance to live happily ever after.
