You’re tired of hectic work schedules, raising kids, running errands, and modern daily life.
You’ve been with the same partner for years. It’s not the same as it used to be. The desire is somehow replaced with the mundane, daily bills and chores. And when you’re tired, it’s hard to get excited for romance in and out of the bedroom.
I hear this complaint quite often. And hey, everyone needs a little advice every now and then. Here’s the juice:
Make Time for Sex
As simple as this sounds, it’s quite easy to forget with everything going on. You’ll suddenly find that everything else comes first. As days pass and moments of connection are missed, you’ll arrive to a point where things are distant between you two. Prioritize it.
Effort
Sex should be spontaneous? False. Think of when you first started having sex. You might think it was spontaneous but it actually wasn’t. You’d put effort, creating small moments of playfulness and anticipation throughout the day. Whether it was sending a sweet text while at work, or getting dressed and prepped. Sex is not just half an hour before the act. It stops being sexy when there’s no effort.
Sexual boredom is quite common in couple-hood. Getting creative can help create novelty
Play Erotic Games
Sexual boredom is quite common in couple-hood. Getting creative can help create novelty. It could be as simple as sexting, to sensory play such as striptease or role-playing. Maybe some erotic truth or dare won’t hurt. Use your imagination!
Nonsexual Touch
I hear couples complain about touching each other only just before sex. Scientific studies have proven the many benefits of touch. It helps create playfulness and connection. Everything you do outside the bedroom helps inside the bedroom.
Communication is Lubrication
Talking about it helps partners know how to please each other more, and has been proven to be more sexually satisfying, as studies show. There’s a certain comfort, safety, and trust built. If you’re uncomfortable saying exactly what you want, start with non-verbal cues to signal your desires to your partner.
Fantasies are the adult version of playful imagination. It’s never-ending
Fantasy World
The best go-to is in your mind. Fantasies are the adult version of playful imagination. It’s never-ending. Use your imagination to explore new areas and ideas with your partner.
Ditch the TV at the End of the Day
Need I say more?
Add a Little Danger
Any nonsexual activity outside the bedroom can increase the adrenaline levels in your body. Studies have proven that this helps stimulate the libido. Note: it doesn’t have to be extremely dangerous, stay simple.
Move your Bodies
There’s no doubt that sports can help increase blood flow and body connection. You feel good afterwards. It also helps you get out of your head and focus on your arousal and of letting go of stress.
Sex can be tailored to whatever mood or intensity we’re in, whether it’s a quickie or a long night of passion
Create Erotic Menus Together
Sex can be tailored to whatever mood or intensity we’re in, whether it’s a quickie or a long night of passion. Create different erotic activities that you can choose from on different nights, which partner starts it off, and on what nights.
MS, MFT-Couples and sex Therapist. www.danasarhan.com