This letter is more than just an emotional stir, it’s a phenomenon that is true and I see it every single day. While most real life princesses are actually quite accomplished, your little girl doesn’t know that. For all she knows the key to living ‘happily ever after’ is to look good, find assistance whenever she needs and attract a prince that will swoop her off her feet when she plays the damsel in distress.
The words you choose to affect how your daughter will view herself and the world around her. ‘So what if I call my daughter a princess?’ Well, by doing so you are instilling 4 main concerns:
That she is above everyone else:
This will reflect on her social skills- the way she communicates with others around her, and I would question whether she demonstrates respect to not only friends but also other adults. Confidence is one thing and entitlement is another.
“By labeling girls as ‘special’ they believe it is only normal to expect special treatment and help every time and nothing less.”
Things will get done for her anytime anywhere:
By labeling girls as ‘special’ they believe it is only normal to expect special treatment and help every time and nothing less. This doesn’t prepare girls for the real world. Real world means working hard, failing once, twice and trying again until they can achieve anything.
Her appearance is what is most important:
We live in a world that is appearance-conscious already as it is, add to that a princess-like role model and you have set your little one up for a lot of physical expectations, comparisons and the confidence level that comes with all that. If appearance is always the first aspect anyone comments about to your girls, what does that say about the importance of their personality? I know it’s hard to shield your girls from what media brings to the table and I am not suggesting that you should, but I am encouraging you to highlight that intellect, curiosity and kindness in your daughter.
“Dear parents, please tell your daughter that she is not waiting to be ‘rescued’ in order to become happy, teach her that her happiness is right here at her own will.”
The damsel in distress is the go-to role to play:
This one really kills me. Don’t get me wrong, most real-life princesses we know of today are highly accomplished and great role models but unfortunately this is not what your daughter is exposed to. She sees that a princess’s ‘happy ever after’ is dependent on a man, especially when she’s being ‘rescued’ by her prince.
What does this teach our daughters today? When unsure, play dumb. When interested in a guy, tone it down and make him feel smarter. When curious, ask only one question don’t intimidate. When skeptical, keep it to yourself, nobody likes a know-it-all. Your best asset is your looks first. Most important, this teaches that happiness is achieved by depending on others, especially dependent on a man to sweep your daughters off their feet.
Dear parents, please tell your daughter that she is not waiting to be ‘rescued’ in order to become happy, teach her that her happiness is right here at her own will. Here are 7 phrases you should call your girls instead:
1- A leader
2- Kind hearted
3- Smart and Strong
4- Creative and Curious
5- Responsible and Resilient
7- A Fighter
It takes a strong parent to raise a strong girl, so pass on your wisdom!