12 Reasons why you’re having Painful Sex!

12 Reasons why you’re having Painful Sex!

Featured Image: Shutterstock/Piotr Marcinski

 

Sex should be many things, but painful should not be one of them! Unfortunately, sex isn’t a topic people in Egypt like to discuss, which means many men and and women are completely clueless about it. That is why many women end up having painful sex, without even knowing why. Once you know the reason why your sexual experience is painful, you can start working on a solution. Here are a few common reasons women experience painful sex.

 

“foreplay is not “before the play”; it’s the playtime that opens the door for fun, pleasure, and eventually desired penetration.”

Vaginismus
Vaginismus is pain during sexual intercourse, often due to psychological reasons. Vaginismus is very common and often under-diagnosed. A gynecologist and a sex therapist must work hand in hand in order to treat Vaginismus.

 

Not Enough Foreplay
Foreplay is quite important for a woman’s body in order for her to enjoy sex. In fact, foreplay is not “before the play”; it’s the playtime that opens the door for fun, pleasure, and eventually desired penetration. When couples proceed without putting too much effort into foreplay, often the women isn’t aroused enough. Arousal is when women release natural liquids that act as natural lubricants. Without this, a woman is very dry and penetration becomes very painful.

“If it’s not consensual, then it’s not sex. It’s rape.”

 

Consensuality
Sex must be consensual, often mistaken for the term “consensual sex”. If it’s not consensual, then it’s not sex. It’s rape. When a woman doesn’t want to have sex, despite all odds, her body is in defense mode. Again, the woman is very dry and hence penetration becomes painful if not violating. Her silence doesn’t mean it’s a yes.

 

History of Sexual Abuse

Often times history of sexual abuse can prevent women from enjoying sexual acts or pleasure, even if the abuse occurred twenty years ago. People’s thoughts, emotions, and experiences are brought to the bedroom and translated into their sexual interactions. If previous sexual abuse was not dealt with properly, it will still translate into the present tense.

 

Infection or Inflammation 

Regular gynecological checkups as well as daily hygiene are both extremely important in order to maintain or treat any possible infections, STDs, or inflammation. Please consult your gynecologist regularly.

 

Illness 

Illness can cause dryness in a woman’s sexual parts. This is normal. If the illness is a long term condition, please do consider couples therapy in order to learn about ways that help in dealing and working around certain challenges.

 

Other Medications
Some medications cause dryness or a decrease in libido. Certain anti depressants or anti anxiety medications as well as others are known to cause such side effects. Please research all medications prior to starting them, consult your doctors, and be extra careful.

“Research has proven that many women seem to have a reaction to latex condoms.”

 

Irritation or Allergy caused by Certain Condoms
Research has proven that many women seem to have a reaction to latex condoms. If so, consider buying non-latex condoms available in many stores worldwide.

 

Stress or tension

Stress is an immediate libido killer and can also cause dryness. Taking care of oneself is as important and necessary for your body and mind.

 

Lack of Desire

Although arousal plays a direct field in wetness, desire also plays a role in how an individual’s body reacts during sex.

 

Hormonal Changes

Hormonal imbalances or changes caused by different life stages or at certain times of the month can have a direct impact on the libido and body parts. Again, working hand in hand with your gynecologist will help educate, inform, and maintain hormonal imbalances by what is necessary.

“Often the body acts out what the heart and mind are experiencing. One of the symptoms can be a decrease in libido and wetness, among other symptoms.”

 

Trauma

Trauma, a psychological reaction to certain life events translates to psychosomatic symptoms. Often the body acts out what the heart and mind are experiencing. One of the symptoms can be a decrease in libido and wetness, among other symptoms. If you think you are or someone you know is experiencing this, please do consider therapy.

 

 

Dana Sarhan

Consultant/Clinical Couples and Sex Psychotherapist
danasarhan.com

The HealthQuarters Polyclinic
Tueny Bldg, 1st floor
Beydoun St., Nasra Area
Ashrafieh, PO Box 11-80 Riad El Solh
Beirut, Lebanon
Tel: +9611425482
Mob: +9613175599

Prime Clinics

Katameya Heights Compound, 5th Settlement
Cairo, Egypt
Tel: +20227585263

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